Preview of THE morning-after.

Over the past several years I have come to think of “heaven” as the morning after a really good party.  You know the scenario; we sit around in our pj’s, curled up with our morning lattes’, on fluffy white sofas with our nearest and dearest of the honored guests and family.  We sit for hours, rehashing the events, the glamour, the setting, the miss-haps and the gossip of the previous nights’- goings on.  It is my very favorite part of a party!!

That is how I felt this past week when I had lunch with my friend Paige and her husband Jack, and how I feel whenever I talk to Leeder, Tayo, Bobbi,  Marcia,  Rich or Ed or any of the friends with whom I have a long and colorful history.  Thursday may have been the first time Paige and I have seen each other since we graduated from high school nearly forty-seven years ago.  We had a lot of filling-in to do.

Paige and I met in the fifth grade when we both became Ticktockers.    As I’ve mentioned before, Ticktockers is the daughter’s branch of the mother-daughter philanthropic organization, National Charity League.  It is also where Paige and I were taught to be ladies, or at least that was the goal.

I remember the first day of ticktockers because I was perhaps the youngest girl in attendance, (even though I was by far the tallest, with Paige a close second,) at age eleven.  Ours was a group of fifth and sixth grade girls, who came together once a month from that time until we graduated from high school, for the purpose of doing service in our community and to learn social graces.  (I guess they knew it would take more than one meeting.)   Paige and I became fast friends that first day even though we lived in neighboring cities. 

At the age of sixteen, my family moved.  I was suddenly thrust into a new high school, where Paige was one of the two people I knew.  She instantly became my go-to-girl for lunch or confidance-sharing or talk about boys .  It was the early sixties, before Rove V Wade and during the time when Kennedy was assassinated.  My bond with Paige was deep and honest.  She was the voluptuous blonde to my flat-chested brunette. We shared the experience of our Mothers being friends and the fact that our training for life was similar, if not identical; how we looked, how we behaved, how we shopped, how we set a beautiful table. These qualities took precedence over careers.  It was a different time, especially for women.  Neither of our mothers worked outside the home.

Paige and I were among the few of our friends who married and had children right out of high school.  We kept track of each other for a while, hearing snippets of each other's lives off and on throughout the years, but never actually seeing each other.  When I received a comment on one of my blog-posts last summer, I squealed with delight and recognition.  She said she had Googled “Ticktockers” and my face had popped up.  (I love the Internet!)  We got in touch by phone and just hearing her voice was like going home. 

So last week when I received an email from Paige saying that she and Jack were driving down the coast and would like to have lunch I was thrilled!  I would have moved heaven and earth to see them.

I stood at the hostess podium at the Four Seasons Biltmore in Santa Barbara and jumped when I heard a familiar voice say my name.  “Kathy?”  Paige!  Jack!  Oh my God you both look the same!  Well, we all looked a little softened by the years.  Jack’s hair and beard were gray but he still looked the athlete he was in high school.  Paige was the same as I remembered her to be.  She was  beautiful, stylish, poised, funny and real.  It felt so good to be together again.

We sat outside for a half hour or more before we took a look at the menu.  We talked about the “party” our lives had been so far.   Paige and Jack, still married, had raised three great kids and traveled the world.  I had done the same only I’d done it alone and with a serial of husbands.  Neither of us drinks anymore. We both have grandchildren we adore.

We laughed at how we still love to shop, agreeing that it was in our “training.”  We spoke of our mothers who are now both gone and how we believed they would be happy we were together.  Before we parted, Jack took our picture.  Our arms were draped around each other like sisters, fighting back tears.

I would like to think of the end of my life as being just that way.  Where we all have a big reunion and talk about how much fun we had, what we wore, what THEY wore and how it all worked out perfectly.  I imagine saying something like; “We made it!  I want to do it again!”  Or “Can you believe what a blast that was?”   Or “I think I really got it that time!”  Or, “I am SO never going on that ride next time!”  It is somewhat like the morning after a great wedding.  The events of our lives that were years in the planing that are over in a blur and only the pictures remain.

How is it that nearly fifty years have passed?  Most of it was fun.  We did do a great job!  Would we do it again the exact same way?  Who knows?  I know I will see Paige again one day.  Maybe Tom and I will visit them in northern California or maybe it will be at some other reunion.  Maybe it will be the morning-after rehash in the after-life.  I think I still have a little work to do in this class, maybe a lot.  Still, I can’t wait to see the yearbook!  I know it will all go by too fast anyway.

My life is so glamorous!  It’s just now fair, lucky for me!!

 

 

 

Comments

[Ed Reiman]

As in Paige "Carlson"?!?!?! OMG !!!!

[Marcia Peterson]

Exquisite writing, Kathy. I felt it as I read your words. Such a pleasure and honor to have you share your words.
I am always reminded how precious our lives are.

With much love from a forever fan,
Marcia

[Shelley Meaney]

Love it mom!! Doesn't it feel great to be 17 again!?

[Peter Jackson]

What a wonderful story. Where does the time go? I was telling MM last night about my first high school job, 50 years ago ! Peter