Just add this to the list.

I have taken to chewing sugarless gum.  This may not seem newsworthy to some, but to me it is remarkable for a few reasons. 

First of all, my mother pretty much forbade me from chewing gum of any kind, saying I looked like a cow chewing her cud.  Okay, I get that.  A lady doesn’t stand around smacking her lips and chowing down on double mint or Dentyne no matter what.   It’s liable to fall out of her mouth and get on her party shoes.  I hate seeing an attractive girl, smoking or chewing gum. It spoils the illusion of loveliness and it just seems wrong!

Then there is the issue of artificial sweeteners.  They are BAD!!  I’ve told my husband a thousand times that diet Pepsi is the devil’s brew.  So is sorbitaol and aspartame and whatever else they put in that stuff to trick you into thinking you’re having desert.   I protest!  For years if I wanted a coke or a piece of pie or candy, I simply went with the real thing, but now that I’m off sugar, I have no choice.

There are specific times when a carbonated beverage such as coke is called for.  When Mexican food is the fare for example.  I cannot enjoy a taco without a coke to wash it down.  Diet coke has taken its place.  I never drink the whole thing, not even close.  I just need a little sip to swish around with the hot sauce and make me feel festive and dangerous.  Sugarless gum does the same trick.

When I was in Italy this past fall, we stopped at a little auto-mart where they sold jars of sugarless gum that promised to clean my teeth and freshen my breath.  I bought some and found that it not only served those purposes, but also helped me manage the stress of riding with my friend as she drove like a bat out of hell around Italy.  I came home with only a few pieces out of a hundred, which I shared with my granddaughter Holland.

Holland chews gum when she plays volleyball.  It is her secret weapon.   She HAS to have it sort of like some people need their lucky shirt or their lucky thong.  Holland cannot go into a match without her Orbits.  I’m beginning to understand.

I have never smoked.  I thought smoking was absolutely disgusting!  Still do.  I felt similarly about gum chewing.  It just didn’t look nice.  I guess time and a sugar-free diet have changed the way I see things, but no, not completely.  I still think it is not lady like but I agree with Holland that chewing a big wad of gum can get the blood moving and redirect stress.  My mother may have been right about the appearance of a lady,  but for me there are few vices left!

No gum, no candy, no booze, no drugs?   I guess I can just breathe!!  Oh, and have a glass of water.

My life is so glamorous!  It’s just not fair, lucky for me!!

 

Comments

[Don Mc.]

Have been chewing sugarless bubblegum since I had cancer and needed to get off Nicorette. Good, Bad, I really have no preference. It's sure cheaper than smoking, in more ways than one. I try to do it subtly when with company but when alone I go all out. Helps with the thirst from the meds I take also plus I love popping the bubbles. Like being a kid again.